National Library Week 2008

Jim thought the light reflecting off the pages of the thesaurus made Suzy’s face look almost perfect; not quite as beautiful as the sheer perfection of the Dewey Decimal system, but beautiful nevertheless. - Anonymous

The faint but distinct slap, slap, slap could be heard throughout the stacks as the philosophy students were contemplating their final exam question. What is the sound of one hand clapping? - Anonymous

This novel is the worst to ever be set in a library. - Anonymous

It was dingy, quiet library, the books have yellowed and are caked with dust. - Andrew Lazaro

S...S...why aren’t these books in alphabetical order? - Kate Boulanger

There is a simple, twelve step program for breaking your addiction to books. Step 1: admit you have a problem - Kelsey Miranda

As the sun went down outside, the technician applied the methyl cellulose to yet another page of a dilapidated old tech report. Who even reads the tech reports anyway? - Anonymous

Excuse ME I woke up with a smile on my face...in the library! - Cristian Pimentel

I knew it was going to be a long night when the fire alarm went off and I didn’t even notice. - Emily Evans

Don’t read this book. - Raha Moussavi

This is a story about the everyday responsibilities of a librarian. - Matt Wainwright

Reeding iz veree impurdant; so reed a bowt thiz liberry! - Rhiannon Cuiacchiaso

I decided to narrate every book I could see. - Kelsey Miranda

Who stole our Dewey decimal system? - Brianne O’Neill

Hey, you never told me you could read. - Kelsey Miranda

To be in the library, or not to be in the library - that is the question. - Jo Ellen Sullivan

Once upon a time at WPI, during finals week, a young man was desperately trying to finish his MQP, IQP, and his sufficiency all at once... - Ryan Pagano

It was a textbook case of myopia...the shrewish librarian couldn’t ever even lend a hand to her costumers. - Anonymous

As the historically challenged librarian screamed, "Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor,?" he knew it was a lost cause; nevertheless, he would not submit to Google until they pried the card catalog from his cold, dead hands.
Like any other day, all was quiet in the western wing. - Madison Dickson

As the sheriff entered, I knew that it would be the last time I read Shel Silverstein. - Nick Bebel

Gary’s biting sarcasm cut deep; not as deep as a knife but deeper than a paper cut one gets from mishandling Webster’s 3rd International Dictionary. - Anonymous

When I saw her walk into the bathroom of the Gordon Library with the Journal of Romance Studies in her hand, I knew it was true love. - Anonymous

Steve had never seen such confusion - unless perhaps when he mistakenly walked into a Japanese fish market wearing his bathrobe, at which time it was all he could do to avoid being pushed into a vat of calamari by overzealous restaurateurs who didn't realize that setting up a fish market in the lobby of a hotel was a bad idea — no, not even then had there been such a hubbub as when he stepped out of the stairwell onto the third floor, where it seemed some sort of doctrinal schism had prompted the library staff to divide into two factions, which were currently occupied with reshelving the entire floor, one group convinced that LOC subject headings were gospel while the other professed undying loyalty to Melvil Dewey, and each eager to convert the library to their preferred system of classification, as though proper organization of literature could singlehandedly solve all the world's problems; given the horrendous disarray of the library at that point, Steve nearly began to agree with this particular point of view as he stepped over one apparently-unconscious librarian and began searching for the most recent issue of the Journal of Symbolic Logic.- Anonymous

I woke up with a smile in my face…in the library! As I realized I slept in a cubicle. - Pedriant Peria

"Wait a minute!" she exclaimed. "This isn’t a library at all." It was Project Presentation Day Eve, and all was quiet in the library." "Hey! What time is it?" said Julissa as she woke up from her accidental slumber. - Anthony Nunez

The end. - Sam Wentzell

I get e-mail, therefore I am. - Jessical Mathew

There was once a WPI student that didn’t know how to read... - Gerard Dwan

Whoever you are, don’t read this book, because, well, where are you really? - Stephanie Napierkowski

As the stacks of books piled up higher and higher, I knew the murder would be my only escape. - Nick Bebel

"Excuse me sir, please do not take that journal into the bathroom!" I heard as I opened the door. What the librarian didn’t know was the reason for me going into the bathroom with the journal. We were both about to embark on a journey that would change our lives forever. - Hamlet Nina

"So...you’re a girl?" - Matt Napierkawski

Books bequeathed to the library by the Baker family who had finally died out in 2006 had been gathering dust in a small custodian's closet since that time and had become so infested with silverfish that the books could have walked quietly down the hall, albeit at a slow pace due to the shortness of the little legs. - Bob Grady

The realization dawned at daybreak, as I cracked open my sleep-encrusted eyes and traced a finger down the reddened helix embossed on my left cheek, pausing to swipe at a small pool of collected moisture that had leaked from the corner of my mouth, which was pressed up against the WPI Seal proudly emblazoned at the center of on a fat spiral-bound notebook of the deepest crimson: I'd always wanted to spend the night in Gordon Library, and now I'd done it. - Joan Killough-Miller